65,000 Chihuahuas

Since I’ve been writing for this blog I’ve been thinking an awful lot about junk. Other peoples junk. Especially the amazing things my friends and acquaintances have owned over the years that I have coveted. A childhood babysitter of mine slept in a black lacquered waterbed that I fantasized about nightly while laying in my own pathetic little box spring deal. A good friend owned a fuzzy magenta sofa that featured completely mirrored front and sides. Functional and easy to clean! It goes without saying that if you get me a gift it should be both tacky and reflective.

Thinking of others trash that could be my treasure made me recollect the Collyer Brothers. Homer and Langley, hoarders royale, were a couple of kooky eccentrics that lived in a brownstone up in Harlem on Fifth Avenue. Over the course of several years these gentlemen amassed an impressive 130 tons of trash, tchotchke and other curiosities. 130 tons. For those of you who, like me, took Dangerous Minds math classes in high school because your brain just doesn’t work that way, that is 260,000 pounds. 31,000 gallons of milk. Not skim – ew. Or roughly 65,000 chihuahuas.

Luckily, no chihuahuas were found in the Collyer brothers home. But 25,000+ books, jarred pickled human organs, an old Model T chassis and 14 pianos were. Imagine if Junkluggers had been around to clear and then donate all of those amazing things! Wanna know what else was found? Any guesses? That’s right, the Collyer Brothers. Yes, in late March 1947 Harlemites began complaining of suspicious smells wafting from the home. Poor old Homer, who was a near blind invalid, was discovered dead from cardiac arrest. Langley was nowhere to be found and only days later did police discover the poor guy, long gone, crushed under a pile of suitcases and newspaper stacks. An apparent booby trap he himself had set to capture burglars. Can you imagine if Kevin McAllister had fallen prey to his own booby traps in Home Alone? The world would have been robbed of an amazing sequel.

If only Junkluggers had been around to help the Collyer brothers clear away their impending doom. The moral? Not only is Junkluggers an amazing removal company…they can also save lives!